woke up with these unbearable cramps....surprise surprise my period came....and the pain feels like contractions....ughhh....i hate this.....i must seem so bitchy to everyone around me...i snapped at my mum and brother....but that's nothing new....everyone i know bother's me in some way.... that's why i always isolate myself from everyone...because you get hurt less that way...no one to let you down or for you to let other's down....your just in your own bubble/ world...but that can also be dangerous....everytime im in the car..which means there's no way to escape the people im with...i always have my internet going on my phone and my music in my ears....i know, that i isolate myself from the world on purpose and then cry that "im so alone" ...it's like a catch 22....so what do i do..? nothing....because it's just easier that way... almost 9pm and today i've had 3 pieces of gum =15 cals and water....this is the best i've done in a while without ruining it....so im happy about that...anyway im getting paid in a week and im gonna pick up my coach poppy side purse..excited for that...i need something good at the end of this fast..... =))
update more later when im feeling up to it...i know i was blogging alot more but my depression has increased in the last month so i just haven't been on here...but i'll start blogging more =)
xx mandie
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