Saturday, July 17, 2010


Hey everyone....things have been kinda not good...nothing new...i've been getting more chest pains than usual ...i really have to lay off purging for a's really starting to scare the point where i dont think im going to wake up to see morning. I have all these fears. Like if i dont purge my food im going to have a heart attack and die from eating. Or if i exercise to much where my heart is beating really fast im gonna have a heart attack from all the pressure i've put on my body from the last 2 years. God i hate this...i feel so trapped in my own problems... everyone i know is to busy doing there own thing to be here for me....i keep thinking what did i do to deserve this...? maybe this is the whole cliché thing that is "suppose" to make me stronger...i really hope there's something good for me down the line...i dunno if i can take much more of this.

1 comment:

  1. your body is giving you so many warnings...won't you please help yourself get out of this "trap" you describe?
    you know, no help out there will be a miracle have to take the first step and make a promise to yourself and then commit to getting better...
    "this" is not going to make you stronger, fighting and overcoming this major health challenge will do that for you...when will you be ready??? I am so cheering for you...
    xxxxxxx <3