Thursday, July 8, 2010

I confronted my sister ''/

i told my sister about her not making an effort and not caring about my ed.... she said she would make more of an effort and that she was scared and that shes's sorry, that she didnt know how to go about asking cause she didnt want to hurt my feelings or bring it up if i didnt want to talk about it....i guess i kinda understand..still hurts that it took her soo long to get it....but im gonna try my best to let it go and forgive her.... i just expect so many things from people and when it doesn't come threw like i imagined it really hurts. I really didn't want to resent her for years....so i just confronted her about it...went better than i thought....but it still bothers me that i had to almost "ask" her to care....cause i called her and told her what i was feeling... she was the first person i told about my ed... why couldnt she just call once and be like "hey mandie, hows your problem going.." something so small.... i even asked her that and she said that would have been to "bold" so i dunno.... i will definitely forgive her when i've gotten over her not being there...but i probably wont ever forget it....i mean i told her over 7 months ago...and she never once asked me how i was doing....it's like me telling her im an alcoholic and she just carrying on with her life...that scarred me.... family letting you down like that...you wont forget it.... im trying my best to see it from her point of view but im just to sad to care....

peace&love

1 comment:

  1. you initiating this takes guts. but my sweet angel, sometimes expectations have a way of destroying our bonds. so try to forgive even without seeing her point of view; because you will feel lighter and then a fresh start would not be tainted with negative feelings. family should be supportive, but people are just different. your sister is learning to care as you two become closer. hang in there; life can be cruel at times...but it can also be beautiful...feeling its beauty after suffering has a much sweeter flavor. you just keep reaching out; others will learn to respond and then care without being asked. my angel...don't lose hope. xx

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